Genius, thy name is Bobblehead Dan Uggla

It is October. That is a fact.

Do you know what October means?

No, not that... it's a stupid game anyway. But I'm not bitter... 

Sigh

No, October means Halloween.

Yes

Halloween is my favorite for two reasons:

Number one:

I've been dressing up for years, so I pretty much invented Halloween. You may have seen one of my many disguises before.

And number two:

My costume this year? Yeah. It's awesome.

Please Don't Feed [Bobblehead Dan Uggla to] the Animals

The other day I was watching a show on TV about animals. I thought to myself, "I want those." So I went and found some. (Actually I had my agent find me some.) I didn't want to be flocked by adoring fans, so I got in disguise as Batless Bobblehead Dan Uggla and we went to the State Fair. The animals were a little larger than I expected (they didn't look so big on TV) but they looked so fluffy that I thought they'd be okay.

Things started out okay with an innocent picture with an innocent sheep...

These chickens were a little scarier, but their cage kept me protected and safe I was so intimidating that they didn't dare mess with me...

I donated a quarter from my vast wealth and fed the goats. I was really starting to get into this!

Maybe I was getting a little too into this... 

Then the animals started to get a bit too friendly.

Then I was attacked by a viscous (don't let the looks fool you) beast of some sort. 

Well, and then this happened...

Why didn't they show me this sign in the first place?

Ahem, I mean, I told those animals what was what, and they ran away scared. I am so awesome.

I, Traveling.

As a traveling bobblehead, sometimes I often travel. This week took me to Philadelphia, where I was the featured inspirational speaker at a convention of people who need inspiration. As you might imagine, this was a lot of hard work, so I didn't have much time to visit the city. Here I am at my luxurious hotel:

They always make these beds way too big.

I never leave without my laptop, which allows me to keep up on my work - and connect with my fans.

After working all day, I was able to sneak away for a while to see the city a little bit. Here I am in Philadelphia.

Heading out to see the city

Dark pic in front of City Hall. (Don't worry, this photographer will be eliminated.)

Hard Rock Cafe. Disregard the large hand in the photo and refer to above caption.

Philly Cheesesteak. Oh yes.

The "Love Statue." Much bigger than I expected.

The Liberty Bell. Maybe I went inside and rang it with my head, and maybe I didn't. You'll never know.

After seeing the town a little bit, I even had time to stop by and see some old friends. The life of a Bobblehead Dan Uggla is a good life.